A bus. An ordinary bus on an ordinary day. Its not peak hour any more, I've worked late and the time has passed since the heavy tussle that comes with the afternoon. Now things have slowed down with more places to sit on each vehicle. The book I am trying to read isn't good. I look up and about. Such is the world that we live in, few people are doing the same. Even those without a phone to play with or a friend to talk to, stare ahead squarely at nothing, as if real life is a distraction.
A man sits behind me, four seats further back. He catches my eye. Grins. His sea blue eyes are luminous, his stubble unpracticed, and his impromptu happiness breaks an otherwise handsome face into an expression of lopsided mischief. Who wouldn't be hooked? My heart pounds. I look away. The driver breaks unexpectedly and elderly passengers make annoying noises of disapproval as they bend forward, riding the motion, their old bodies like carriages at a rail yard suddenly brought to a halt.
I look out the window to catch a glimpse of my own reflection in the day's fading light and open my face up into a smile. I read somewhere if you are happy enough to smile when no one is watching, you must really mean it. Someone is watching me today. Blue eyes from the back seat makes me self conscious.
A colleague told me I looked like a nurse earlier, my work shirt is blue and white check. It accentuates my breasts and I don't mind that it brings to mind a uniform. I've left the morgue and I like to pretend I have been at an office, working somewhere that smells less like disinfectant and has a view, preferably of water and trees.
Blue eyes focused in my direction cause the hairs on the back of my neck to tingle. A few delicious minutes pass by. I shift in my seat, watch members of the geriatric community pick their way carefully down the aisle and out into the strange, suspended, autumnal sunset on the street, their large, practical handbags held with purpose under fleshy, under-used arms.
I flinch. The man at the back of the bus shows me a dimple and I imagine he might share my sense of humour. I pause to scratch an itch on my leg. My stockings dip under the weight of my nails and I'm careful to alleviate the itch with a featherlight touch. These are my last pair.
Blue eyes gets up from the back of the bus. My stomach lurches. If he leaves it will just be me and the sky, the high pitched noise of the bus breaks at each stop and row after row of shops and houses. He doesn't get off. The action of his hand curling around the arm rest near my shoulder has a sensual flavour, as though he's caressing skin, not the thin aluminium rail.
He sits behind me. I swivel to look. I want to start a conversation but my throat is dry.
“Your eyes are questioning.”
“This is my poker face.”
He laughs. It's magic. I bite my lip.
“Hi Tim. Want to come home with me?”
I haven't thought about the words, they come out of my mouth before I've willingly formed them and it leaves me with a strange sensation in my middle. Say yes. I don't want to fail.
“Paula are you always this forward?”
I glance out the window and realise my stop is coming up. I ring the bell. Up the front of the bus feet shuffle as the elderly prepare themselves for the stop. It puts my nerves on edge. We grind to a halt. I get up without looking back. I can sense the heat his body gives off as he follows me. The bus pulls away in a blast of hot air and brake noise. Highway sounds hide my confusion. Tim gestures for me to lead the way. I start walking.
After only four paces, maybe five, he tugs on my arm and I lurch to a halt. I hadn't realised I was practically running. His palm is warm and calloused as it slips into mine. We don't say anything. I start off once more, slower this time, towing him away from the heavy noise of the street.
We take a turn, heading further away from the steady traffic and into cool, overhanging peppermint gums lining the road.
“Wait!” he says “Are you real?”
“I don't know.” It comes out in a whisper.
I want him to kiss me. Silence feels like foreplay. I'm angry at the mundane, suburban setting. In the world of my imagination my handsome stranger would tug me into an alleyway. We would embrace with passionate, frantic urgency.
I look up from my own thoughts into unsettling azure blue. I can't bear to keep staring. We're holding hands, facing each other like lovers. He uncurls his fingers, releasing me. I feel the cool afternoon air where his palm has been connected to mine. He raises his hands to my face, encircles my cheeks in an intimate gesture. I catch my breath.
“Do you want me?”
He leans forward and kisses my nose. I brush the softness of my cheek through his waiting hand, eyes closed. I don't answer the question, I don't feel I need to. I just wait.
“Do you come here often?”
He strokes his thumb across my lower lip. I know my torso trembles. I can feel my body reacting to his touch and I can hear it too, in my quiet, jagged breaths.
The not knowing is over. I stretch up on tippy-toes and connect my lips to his. Hot and full, a reward for all the pissing about. I assess their weight, time and again before drawing the courage to press for an open-mouthed gesture. He complies. The afternoon threatens rain. Tim tastes of salt and aniseed, promise and apricots. He pulls away. I don't know what he sees.
“Can we go somewhere?”
I smile, open my eyes wide and grin like the world is winning. My familiar street fades and I start to look at the surrounds as though I have never seen them before. He doesn't take my hand as we move off. We don't speak.
In the hall at the apartment block I fumble for my keys. For a moment I'm nervous. He slides a warm hand across my kidney as I rummage in my bag. I forget what it is to be nervous. It's a game, a foregone conclusion.
I open the door to my rooms and we go into the silence together. I take a drink of water and look across at him as I down the lukewarm liquid. I imagine his cock in his pants and how it might taste. I close my eyes, letting the water run over my tongue in the darkness. When I reopen them he stands with his hands in his pockets, eyes on the ground. His brown hair obscures the expression on his face. He plays with his feet, leaning on the arches, balancing and then bringing them flat to the floor.
Tim looks up. Clears his throat.
Before I've closed the distance between us entirely I've started work on the buttons of his shirt. It's a light plaid, not dissimilar to mine and I want it gone. It feels like I'm unwrapping a present. He brushes my hair back behind my ear, assisting me and at the same time adding a tingling sensation to my face, my neck and the zero-ing heat in my middle.
A gentle finger under my chin draws my eye line away from small, clear buttons. This time it's Tim who leans in, offering his lips for an embrace. The moment feels quiet, fragile, a palpable amount of trust in the air. In my minds eye our passion explodes like sex in a foreign film, all heaving breaths and rank, rabid movement as the participants devour one another in love play. Tim takes his time. He presses kisses on my mouth as though savouring the taste.
With my eyes closed I will him to hurry up. I don't want gentle, I don't want affection. My body sings to be fucked. I lean in, opening my mouth, our teeth click. My eyes are closed as I fumble for shirt buttons, clearing the material from his chest, bending my head, biting his nipple. He squirms, swats me away. His eyes are a deeper blue, steeped in lust. I lick my lips and flick his belt buckle.
Tim takes a run at my shirt, foregoing buttons, a few of them pop as he slides material over my breasts, over my head, discarding the garment carelessly on the floor. I've a light pink lace bra and my nipples stand to attention trapped beneath it. Tim bends his head and adds moisture to the lace, embracing first one aureole, then the other in a sloppy, covetous kiss.
I can't help it. I squeeze my thighs together. He rubs the front of my skirt, cupping what he can find of my pussy in my tight, navy work skirt.
“Tell me what you want?”
I open my eyes. He drags a thumb across the wet material on my nipple, expertly distracting my thoughts.
“I want you to take all your clothes off. I want to watch you do it. By the time you get to naked I want your stiff cock to spring free, begging to be buried in me. I want you to stand in front of me and hold onto it. So I can see you throbbing to fuck a woman. Then I want you to go find my bedroom. I'll get undressed. I'll follow you and I want you to start by eating my pussy. What I want most is to have your head buried between my legs... You know, you've got beautiful eyes”
“And you've a dirty mouth.” His voice is uncommonly deep, desirous.
I take a breath, close my eyes to steady myself.
“Will you do it?”
Tim unclasps my bra and removes the lace garment. My breasts feel heavy, needy. He cups them in both hands and slides his palms up my torso. I snap the catch on his pants. My shaking thumb and forefinger find the zipper, the cotton of his jocks and the cock beneath. His adam's apple bobs in amazement. I take the flesh and grasp his meat in my hand. It grows and grows. Tim kicks off his shoes.
He leads me to the couch, just a few steps away and seats me facing him. We kiss. It's an encounter loaded with promise and heavy breathing. I revel in it. Our messy tongues find warm, moist flesh. Tim rips my tights. He rolls them down, off my thighs and shimmies up my skirt. My knickers are damp and he tugs my hips towards him, I slump in the seat. He drags my knickers to one side and tastes my pussy, wetting the material and my flesh with his tongue. It's delicious. I squirm, reaching to bury my hands into his hair.
My knickers slide off in his deft hands and I spread my thighs wide. Tim licks and toys with my clit. I tremble, I ache. I ply at his shoulders, willing him to break contact with my wet skin. I want his cock to slide inside me. I can feel an orgasm blooming.
He inserts digits. I lose control. On the verge of orgasm I pull on his arms. Come to me. Don't let me die in your arms. Lust and blackness engulf my vision. I feel him pull back, finally, moments before my surrender. He sits astride the coffee table, creating distance between us. His proud, protruding member is hard and thick. I lick my lips, crawl on my knees towards him but fail to take the meat in my mouth. Instead we exchange sticky kisses, he tastes of sweat and me. It's exhilarating. I waste no time beginning to slide my pussy down his pole.
His blue eyes are hidden behind dilated irises. Tim's breath is short and his chest heaves. I feel so proud. We both look down at the connection of our sexes, my pussy juice coating his shaft. Before I'm sunk full of cock, he braces his heels and moves us, until I'm buried in the couch, my back to the cushions, cock meat all the way in.
I bite my lip bury my nose in his neck. I don't want him to stroke. I feel sated, played, he's all the way inside me and I'm full up, dominated, aroused. With his big hands, Tim tilts my hips. His thumbs press upon my hip bones and his cock begins to glide in and out. Blue-black eyes feast on my expression. I stare back up at him, relishing the unfamiliar feeling of being taken, ridden, enjoyed.
I use my hands to steady us and make an effort to push back. The couch is too forgiving and the sensation dwindles. Wordlessly we switch to the floor, dragging a cushion for my pelvis and another for my head as we shift. My toes touch his ears as he drives into my softness. I'm alive. I tingle with knowledge and the precipice beckons. I don't know when I'll fall.
Tim leans back, he takes a moment to watch his cock as it hides and reveals itself. Then he licks a thumb and thrusts it towards my clit. I grind on his hand and explode into shards of delirium. Tim stops the action of his fingers and shifts his weight. He pistons into me, shaking with the effort of it. I hold onto his back, his butt; spent and waiting for him to cum.
He doesn't. Instead he withdraws, I keep my legs spread and he beckons my hands, willing me to jerk him off as I lie underneath him. Blue eyes wander over my prone body. I feel him go extra-specially hard in my hands. He cups my breast. I bite my lip and concentrate on the action of pumping his purple cock. He shudders and a ribbon of semen explodes onto my belly. His cock pulses, still in my hand. Spoof runs down my digits.
He drops his weight onto his hands and leans down to kiss me on the lips. He's panting more than I and we are both slightly sticky with sweat. I let go of his penis. I wipe my hand along the cooling cum on my belly and taste it, just for effect. I get dimples as payoff. Tim flops down onto the floor at my side and for a moment we both stare at my familiar ceiling.
Shyly I slide a palm over his hip. I lean on one elbow, looking at my freshly-found lover. After a moment he opens his eyes.
“I've never picked up a woman on public transport before.”
“I wanted to fuck you on the bus.”
“You have a terrible poker face.”
Tim kisses my nose.